Because it’s one thing to feel flattered, and another to feel creeped

#1

Oh. My. God. I feel like I just got approached by a predator on campus.

I was walking around the vendor fair when a late 20s or something bald, shaved-head man in a black leather jacket approached me saying, “I’m sorry to bother you but I couldn’t help but notice how cute you are.” He was a bit awkward and fumbled behind his words. He proceeded to ask me what I’m here for—a student—seeming surprised and asked what I was studying. Then he asked about my blog. What I like to write. What TV shows I’m into. I asked him as well. To steer clear of sketchiness, I asked him what he was here for in turn, which he hesitated saying he was waiting for a friend, who’s like, here on campus, as a student. That red-flagged me. He asked if I could just spare 5 minutes at Starbucks to talk and hang out. I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, since I’m open to invitations and getting to know interesting people, but something about him was extremely sketchy. It probably wasn’t a good idea to stay with him so I talked my way outta there and jet. He seemed to walk off to find some other place to loiter.

Who know’s what his hidden agenda is, so beware! Flattering, but it’s good to stand your ground and say “No” sometimes…

— December 5, 2013, ~ 4:21PM

#2

OH. MY. GOD. IT STRIKES AGAIN. PART 2? (Really? Is there something about how I look running on only 4 hours of sleep tucked in winter clothing that makes me look inviting today?!)

So I was just at Trader Joe’s browsing the chocolates for a gift. I looked at this aisle for a while when this old, 60-or-something looking Polish man came up to me saying, “Are these chocolates any good?” He seemed like a friendly old man, like a friendly grandfather or neighbor with his Polish accent. I said I wasn’t sure but I’m sure they’re all good (since who can lie, Trader Joe’s rocks in sweets!). He asked me where I’m from, if I’m a student at UCI, what I’m studying (oh there’s no jobs for that! but you’ll find your way), how much longer at UCI I have, and then where he’s from, why he came here, it’s a great area here in SoCal, oh San Francisco is beautiful. What area are you from up in Northern California. Is it finals week now at UCI? Yada-yada. Then all of a sudden he starts to say, “Oh so maybe I’ll call you sometime. We can get coffee or something.”

-____-’ I was in disbelief this was happening again. I couldn’t tell if he was serious because I obviously was a young college student and he much MUCH older than me. I politely declined saying oh I’m not sure, it was okay, but it was nice meeting you. He smiled and we politely bid each other good shopping.

Not as sketch as just a few minutes ago, but Darn. Today is funny. Last day of classes, eh?

— December 5, 2013, ~ 4:42PM

I suppose my encounters call for a blog post dealing with the heavier issues at hand here…

A friend: “I thought that I was doing something to ‘ask’ for it, but that’s just dumb.”

That just makes us as women feel like we are doing something wrong and we have to compromise our own womanhood, livelihood, and overall being as people… That’s not right. We are who we are. We need to own up to it (and learn how to deal with it).

“Too cute for your own good. Be safe, Rachel!”

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